With International Men’s Day falling on Nov. 19, attention turns to an increasing number of new fathers taking parental leave. However, this is not without consequence. 

Many who did so still faced hurdles afterward. Workplace bias and career setbacks are among them, leading some to leave their jobs despite recent surveys in Japan indicating taking paternity leave is a growing trend. 

Keiji Kawanishi, 37, a company employee in Osaka, is currently on paternity leave for one year and is largely responsible for his three children.

His day begins at 7 a.m., preparing breakfast, changing his 10-month-old daughter's diaper and helping his 7-year-old son get ready for school. After seeing his 4-year-old son off to nursery school, he spends his day at home caring for his daughter.

“I never even considered taking paternity leave when my eldest and second sons were born,” he said.

In 2016, when his wife was pregnant with their first child, Kawanishi worked as a freelance lecturer with frequent late nights.

Hoping for a better work-life balance, he joined a logistics company that advertised “less than 10 hours of overtime per month.”

However, after their eldest son was born in 2017 and started attending day care, he faced criticism from his boss who was in his 40s.

When he needed to take time off for his son’s fevers, his boss asked, “Can your wife take time off instead?” This made him feel guilty.

Seeking a more family friendly work environment, he changed jobs.

Although his second son was born in 2020, the idea of taking parental leave didn’t cross his mind as no other men around him were doing so.

In 2023, he joined a community where fathers share their parenting experiences. He found that taking three or six months of parental leave was common, and some even took a full year.

It was only then that he realized, “It’s OK for men to take parental leave.”

This year, he became the first in his department to do so.

According to a labor ministry survey, the paternity leave rate jumped from 3.2 percent in fiscal 2016 to 30.1 percent in fiscal 2023.

“Social attitudes are changing, but I think many fathers still struggle in silence without anyone to talk to,” Kawanishi said.

‘WHAT WOMEN HAVE LONG FACED’

A 46-year-old man in the Kanto region joined a consulting firm four years ago that had been certified by the government for promoting women’s participation in the workplace.

Shortly after starting the job, his child came down with a fever, and he informed his boss that he needed a day off.

The boss in his 50s replied, “You should ask if you may take a day off, not just say, ‘I’m taking a day off.’”

Having grown up in a single-father household and taken care of his younger brother, household chores and child care felt natural to him.

However, in a workplace heavily influenced by his boss, there were some whispers that employees taking time off for their children were a “burden” on others.

Gradually, he began relying more on his wife for parenting duties such as taking their child to nursery school and preparing meals.

This year, he left the company and decided to go independent.

A 36-year-old man in Kawasaki, Kanagawa Prefecture, faced pushback at his auditing firm after deciding to take six months of paternity leave for his first child in 2019.

Several male superiors summoned him to ask, “Are you all right with missing out on promotions?” and “You could just let the mom handle the child care.”

After returning from six months of paternity leave, he began to notice excessive consideration from colleagues. Labeled a “parenting dad,” he found himself excluded from important work opportunities.

“This must be what women have long experienced,” he thought.

This year, he left his job and started working independently. He now equally shares household chores and child care with his wife.

40 PERCENT MULL JOB CHANGE

XTalent, a Tokyo-based firm, has been offering career support services for working parents since 2019.

At first, there were almost no men signing up, but they now make up 30 percent of all registrants.

The firm sees around 1,000 new registrations annually, with those in their late 30s being the largest group.

Most of the companies XTalent connects its registrants with are growing startups, mainly in the information technology sector.

“If companies don’t create environments where people with diverse circumstances can continue working, they will lose talent,” said Tatsuya Ueda, president of XTalent, who also struggled to balance work and child care.

Job search site operator Mynavi recently surveyed 800 employees in their 20s to 40s. In its online poll, 39.5 percent of men who had taken parental leave said they had either left their jobs, switched careers or considered doing so due to difficulties balancing work and child care.

The government has set a goal to raise the paternity leave rate to 50 percent by 2025 and 85 percent by 2030.

Kentaro Tsutsui, 40, a researcher at the Recruit Works Institute, notes, “While individual attitudes and social norms are gradually changing, and systems supporting child care have improved, many companies still hold the belief that men should earn recognition through long working hours.”

“To prevent the rise of a ‘Daddy Track’—a concept similar to the ‘Mommy Track’ where women are often sidelined from important tasks after childbirth—and to curb the increase in unwanted resignations, it’s essential to change the mindset of male executives and bosses who have not actively participated in child care themselves,” he said.

(This article was written by Kayoko Sekiguchi, Yuki Nikaido and Midori Iki.)